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Super Terrific Happy Hour

September 15, 2009

Let’s face it:  there are days when, if the Gypsies came through my neighborhood, I’d sell the kids.  (Sounds harsh, I know, but remember I’m a Mean Mommy.)  Invariably their worst behavior impulses hit during the hectic time when I’m simultaneously trying to wrap things up for the day, clear off a bit of counter space in the kitchen, and throw something together for dinner.  In one of life’s cruel little ironies, this also tends to coincide with my circadian rhythm low point, thus often leading to temper tantrums of Titanic proportions.  (Meaning mommy blows a gasket, and it ain’t pretty.)  Because I believe a bit of sarcasm and gallows humor never hurt anyone, I like to call this often painful part of the day my Super Terrific Happy Hour.  (I think credit for the STHH name belongs to a Seinfeld episode in which Jerry gets a sore hand from signing the hundreds of chintzy residual checks he receives after appearing on a Japanese tv show of the same name.)

In talking to other friends with young kids I have come to realize that this is not an unusual pattern.  I’m not sure what it says about me, but I’m always quite happy to learn that other people’s children can be just as obnoxious as  mine.  Well, okay, I’m actually quite happy to learn that other people’s children are even more obnoxious than mine, but I’ll take what I can get.  And in the context of the STHH that precedes dinner I guess it’s just nice to know I’m not the only one struggling to keep my tenuous grip on sanity while juggling sharp instruments, raw meat, hot burners, whole grains, and two energetic kids absolutely determined to get each other’s goat (and happy to respond to each other’s efforts with appropriate indignation and dramatic flair). 

I don’t know how anyone else handles the STHH, but I’m often tempted to follow Frank Costanza’s lead and bellow “Serenity now!!” at the top of my lungs.

Sigh…4:15pm.  Approximately one hour until the madness kicks in.

Forget serenity now.  We’re going out for dinner tonight.

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2 Comments leave one →
  1. September 15, 2009 5:16 pm

    Great post. I will read your posts frequently. Added you to the RSS reader.

  2. savvymomsafekids permalink*
    September 17, 2009 12:45 pm

    Thank you, Mike!

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